I've been listening to a lot of very cheesy songs recently; bands like Maroon 5, artists like Ed Sheeran and the likes who produce works like 'Sugar' and 'Give me love'.
It's only after binge watching these songs does it dawn on me as to why these artists are overly popular with the girls. They paint a fairy tale; One thing that every girl probably wants, irrespective of how ambitious, career oriented, fed up of failed romantic attempts she might be.
These fictional stories describe how there exist characters whose lives revolve around these women, the lengths to which they are willing to go for her, the way they pamper her and the way they are worried about her.
Now either I am yet to see such stories in real life, or these characters in their true nature are essentially just pure fantasy fiction.
Coming back to reality, which is very different.
You both have jobs. And only in cases where you are living together, would you possibly be able to spend even a couple of hours with each other everyday. Both of you have independent and mutually exclusive social circles. And most people like to keep it like that to a certain extent. They want to be able to spend some time and have some personal space because they do not want to spend every leisure moment with their significant other. The public cuddling and the giggling and making you feel like you're the center of the universe/their princess (whatever floats your boat), doesn't happen. Wake up! They've spent the majority of their lives without you developing relationships in their own world which (more likely than not), will continue to be more important than their relationship with you. This is very possible despite them being in love with you. Being in love with someone and making them the highest priority are two different things. And you can continue picking up any of the videos in any of the 'love' songs and find an unrealistic scenario everywhere.
These videos in turn will end up giving birth to unrealistic imaginations/fantasies. Now I'm not entirely sure whether these are healthy because there are great chances of these fantasies turning up eventually into expectations. From my experiences, it's not healthy to have expectations in a relationship in the first place. Add on to it, if you're a straight woman, you're probably in for a bad surprise. Men don't fantasize about dreamy fairy-land situations. They're not going to surprise you with flowers or whisper modern equivalent of Shakespearean sonnets in your ears.
But despite all the misconstrued notions and flattery you're going to miss, love does exist. He might not take you on a fancy dinner where everyone is dressed in ball gowns and you dance till sunrise, but he will surprise you with breakfast in bed and tickle you till you can't breathe. He won't cuddle you on a park bench overlooking the lake but he will make love to you with passion you couldn't believe the existence of. He may not sing a song or write poems for you, but he will look at you in such a way, if only for a moment, when the world around him would cease to exist and he would marvel in his head at his luck on finding a woman as amazing as you are who loves him for the mess he believes he is.
And when he does that for you, you know that you've found your version of the fairy tale. You're not Cinderella or Snow White. You're you. And you're the star of your own movie.
It's only after binge watching these songs does it dawn on me as to why these artists are overly popular with the girls. They paint a fairy tale; One thing that every girl probably wants, irrespective of how ambitious, career oriented, fed up of failed romantic attempts she might be.
These fictional stories describe how there exist characters whose lives revolve around these women, the lengths to which they are willing to go for her, the way they pamper her and the way they are worried about her.
Now either I am yet to see such stories in real life, or these characters in their true nature are essentially just pure fantasy fiction.
Coming back to reality, which is very different.
You both have jobs. And only in cases where you are living together, would you possibly be able to spend even a couple of hours with each other everyday. Both of you have independent and mutually exclusive social circles. And most people like to keep it like that to a certain extent. They want to be able to spend some time and have some personal space because they do not want to spend every leisure moment with their significant other. The public cuddling and the giggling and making you feel like you're the center of the universe/their princess (whatever floats your boat), doesn't happen. Wake up! They've spent the majority of their lives without you developing relationships in their own world which (more likely than not), will continue to be more important than their relationship with you. This is very possible despite them being in love with you. Being in love with someone and making them the highest priority are two different things. And you can continue picking up any of the videos in any of the 'love' songs and find an unrealistic scenario everywhere.
These videos in turn will end up giving birth to unrealistic imaginations/fantasies. Now I'm not entirely sure whether these are healthy because there are great chances of these fantasies turning up eventually into expectations. From my experiences, it's not healthy to have expectations in a relationship in the first place. Add on to it, if you're a straight woman, you're probably in for a bad surprise. Men don't fantasize about dreamy fairy-land situations. They're not going to surprise you with flowers or whisper modern equivalent of Shakespearean sonnets in your ears.
But despite all the misconstrued notions and flattery you're going to miss, love does exist. He might not take you on a fancy dinner where everyone is dressed in ball gowns and you dance till sunrise, but he will surprise you with breakfast in bed and tickle you till you can't breathe. He won't cuddle you on a park bench overlooking the lake but he will make love to you with passion you couldn't believe the existence of. He may not sing a song or write poems for you, but he will look at you in such a way, if only for a moment, when the world around him would cease to exist and he would marvel in his head at his luck on finding a woman as amazing as you are who loves him for the mess he believes he is.
And when he does that for you, you know that you've found your version of the fairy tale. You're not Cinderella or Snow White. You're you. And you're the star of your own movie.
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